If we were to ask 100 people," Who is the most important person in your life?" We would get 100 lies. Most of them would be sincere and name a relative or friend or spouse or child and a few might say Jesus. They wouldn't think they were being dishonest but they would. I understand there is a push in schools these days to give children self-esteem. "I'm OK, your OK." Your a good person at heart. You brush your teeth and floss. You volunteer to do something for the environment. You ride your bike to school. Your nice to everyone. (Probably not.) Fed on a steady diet of self-deception by the time they become teenagers they know the're pretty great. "Not like that loser that no one likes." In any 12 step program they will sit around and tell one another, "I'm not a bad person." Nothing is ever their fault. "I'm wonderful it couldn't be my fault."

The true answer to the question is me. I'm the most important person in my life. I do my best to make sure my needs are met and more. I like the best I can afford. We want the best parking spot. We want to be at the front of the line. We pamper ourselves, and clothe ourselves and bathe and do our best to be warm in winter and cool in summer.

If we really looked at ourselves honestly and dug down past the self-deception and lies that we tell ourselves we might begin to see that we are selfish, vain, self-seeking and think way to highly of ourselves. There is a very simple test to discover who you truly love most. Who do you think about most? It's your problems, your pain, your unfulfilled desires, your trauma, your self-pity. Jesus said, "If you will lose your life for my sake, you will find it." "Deny yourself, pickup your cross daily and follow me." The cross is death to self. Everything the world teaches us about ourselves is wrong. We don't need to have more self-esteem, more ego, more pride. We need the humility that only comes when we begin to see ourselves as God sees us. We need to feel wonder that God would love someone like me or you. Humanity is a victim of their own propaganda. We need to esteem ourselves as less than others. What am I that God should even look at me much less love me enough to die for me.

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