Notice: This blog is rated P
Yesterday I went in for what was to be a fairly minor surgical procedure, a hernia repair. I was told that I should be in at 6 am and out at 11 am. I thought doing this the day before the 4th of July would be wonderful so I could recuperate on the holiday and not feel compelled to being doing so many things. Well, as the story goes; the best laid plans...
Everything went exactly according to plan through the surgery and recovery. I was brought back to my little holding room on schedule, the doctor came in to say the operation was successful I and was looking forward to leaving around 11 and possibly eating breakfast on the way home. What was that about the best laid plans?
The first problem came with my throat. Somehow I had forgotten how raw my throat feels after having a breathing tube stuffed down it while under anesthesia. Yesterday, and even still today, I think they deliberately chose a 2 inch tube with rough edges to stick down there. My throat is still raw. So much for the breakfast part, I would just have to enjoy my pudding and Jell-O.
Yesterday was certainly not the first time I have had an outpatient procedure done under anesthesia. I was quite familiar with the drill in fact. I knew that before one can leave they have to prove to the anesthesiologist I could urinate. This is standard procedure after minor surgeries all over the world each day. I had, in fact, never had any problem, at least until yesterday.
For 5 hours I tried everything from drinking 5 cups of coffee to intense prayer trying to get some results. Not only were no results forthcoming, I believe the surgeon had turned the faucet off so that I could not see results just to get a laugh (just kidding). At any rate, I spent 5 hours doing everything I could think of to get results. The nurse even increased the drip coming through the IV bag. Nothing was working.
Sometime after 3 pm, I told the nurse to please call the doctor and get permission for a catheter to be put in and solve this problem once and for all. I was willing to endure the pain to get relief and get out of there. By this time there had been a shift change and all the new nurses were brought up to date on my condition. Some laughed, some were concerned and one actually offered some sound advice.
The nurse asked if I would try a strange thing. Of course I said yes. She brought me a cup filled with water with a straw in it. I was to go to the restroom and blow bubbles in the water and supposedly that would produce the desired results. Most of me said “yea sure”, but I was desperate and desperate people will try anything.
After less than a minute of blowing bubbles in the cup, I was able to produce enough urine to not only relieve the growing pressure, but be released to go home. When I came out of the restroom to the nurse’s station and proudly announced victory, the whole area erupted in applause. One would have thought an Olympic medal had just been won. Perhaps it was, for every last nurse said they would now add this unorthodox procedure into their “bag of tricks” for the next poor guy who was struggling after a hernia operation to get the flow going again.
I could get all spiritual and write another blog on what I learned yesterday but since this is the 4th of July, I will spare you the details. I will leave you with these very important words. Sometimes God’s solutions are NOT always in that neat box we want them to be in. Sometimes God’s answers can only be found by thinking outside of the box or by blowing bubbles in a glass of water with a straw.