Here I am alone again...the words alone again have been permanent fixtures in my sentences...I don't feel anything good happening. I am too tired walking this path of pain, loneliness, fear, heartaches, and depression. I am tired of facing the music alone. Yes, I know that You are with me at this stage, but unfortunately I don't feel You.
I am very honest with you God. I really do not know what You want me to do. I am walking and obeying you, but is this what my life will be day in day out. Days of depression, sadness and loneliness. I am so tired. Been crying so much. Been talking to You with my honest heart. I cry to you asking for help...yet I wake up the next day feeling the same...no love, nothings. I am tired of pretending to be positive...just tired!
All I ask is a Chritsian man who loves you that can help me love you more.
I do not know where you are taking me, but I AM tired from walking alone, tired of this...I need a miracle...and unfortunately Lord...I do not see it coming! My doubt and untrust is currently stronger than my hope. I am guilty and feel not good enough be your child.
All hope gone. All doubt so much alive.
But at the end of the day...
I am running the race, I am finishing the couse, I will keep the faith... ..