Like Breathing Under Water
Here goes... my first Blog. And not just here--anywhere.
I have chosen to post this blog under Out of Church Christian for two reasons. 1: I haven't attended a church regularly in over 6 months, so I'd say I'm 'Out of Church'. And 2: I have no clue what it means to be an 'Out of Church' Christian. I'm learning as I go along. But that's for another entry altogether.
I want to begin this first blog by addressing something that I think many people encountered on their way to becoming ChristianBlog members: The Christianity waiver, complete with space for initials. Many of us here, I think, had at least a moment's hesitation when reading the prerequisites (for lack of a better word) for Christianity. As a life-long believer, it has been a long and rough course traveled to where I stand today. Or better yet, where I swim today. I have discovered in these years of faith, or sometimes doubt disguised in the garb of religiosity, that I am swimming rather than walking in faith. What I mean is this: when I think about swimming, the first thing that comes to mind is the inability to breath under water. As a child, I truly believed that I was a mermaid who just hadn't spent enough time in the water to grow my fins. More than once, I actually tried singing under water like Aeriel, with the painful reminder that I was not Aeriel. Because I was unable, am unable, to breathe under water, something about swimming was always unsatisfactory. I learned to swim at a very young age, 5 years old, but in all the years since then, I have never taken a single effective breath under the water. I consider this to be very similar to the way that I conceive of my religious or spiritual life. I learned Christianity at a very young age, but it seems like there's something big that I'm missing out on, like I'm always holding my breath until I surface for that saving breath of oxygen, which may come in the form of a particularly insightful passage or a glimpse of unexpected beauty, but I'm holding my breath at all other times, and when the oxygen runs out, the dissatisfaction comes flooding in.
It seems like there will come a time that being a Christian will finally be the satisfaction of breathing under water I've always dreamed it could be. I'm not there now, but I at least I know how to swim.
-Kathryn
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Author: kathryn88
Location: Austin Texas USA
Gender: Female
Age: 21
Blog Entries: 1 (archive)
Blog Comments: 1
my name is kathryn and i am a 21 year old, originally from kansas city. i grew up in a christian household with my 2 parents and 5 siblings. i attended a vineyard church on sunday mornings and a private, classical school from 4th grade to graduation. needless to say,...
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like i said in my bio, i was born in a christian home and grew up in a christian school going to church weekly. i vaguely remember saying the 'jesus' prayer and know from my mother that it was before i was in kindergarten around age five. now, i have...
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You're opening/introductory blog gives great insight. (FYI, I'm not sure what an "out of church Christian is either)
