Once there was a child I met, but I didn't see the distorted side. For the stock pile of lies between us, left no true sight. Time would do what time does, be time. Then I would learn the child was me.
I was approached by what I always hated, writing, as a hand to be a friend. I called to God, "I dread all speech and everything pertaining to it. What's going on? Why now? Why like what I hate and now procrastinate to what I like? I am not the speller, I'm not the grammar buff, I'm not organized, I am not the writer... I don't know the letters to conservation... How can this be a friend now, to whom I've always hated?
Then a direction was formed when I took a further step, I'll write a book. I would learn this term, book, was the wrong term for me to use by industrial standards. I was writing a manuscript. When it's pulished, then it's a book. Through this journey I would have constant conversation with my new friend. "What am I doing here with you? Why do we have a hate and love relationship?" I would learn why...
I would end up doing the beginner's mistake to a fictional writing. I made the main character, me. Problem? It took over a year of fighting the story to see it. I didn't realize it, while I was writing, I was to busy writing it. Funny, I even tried to help the main character in the story with his problems, when the problem was me.
I sat down to normal quite place before the computer early one morning. I started off back reading what was already written. I did this to get into the flow, so to continue to write in the flow. When it hit me...It's me... this awakening sent me crying. Crying three to four times a day,for five continuous weeks. Tiers, a language only God's mercy feared not it's talk. Through this time I learned many things. But one thing stood clear. Once you apply action to though or thoughtlessness, you can never return to the place before the act. No matter how hard you try, a lie can't become the truth. And there's no space for the in between. The only entree, a performance of love from God, love that knows no restaints. Grace is the love that lifted my face, from the buried me I was held to. Discipline is spelled, love... Obedience is spelled, forgiveness... "Where sin abounds, grace abounds more." And, "love covers a multitude of... ,"yes, me...
"But now God's way of putting people right with himself has been revealed. It has nothing to do with law, even though the law of Moses and prophets gave their witness to it."
Thank you for your consideration.