Two years ago I made four trips around the country visiting a few people who were (and some still are) very active members of this site. No one asked me to do what I did and God knows no one paid me to do it. I simply followed the prompting of the Holy Spirit and did what I felt was the will of God.
Earlier in 2009 I had two life-threatening heart procedures, endured a blood clot in my lung and spent prolonged periods of time in hospitals. Although I was aware of my physical problems and the limitations they placed on me, I was careful and they presented no issues the first two trips which were very profitable and a blessing to all.
The third trip, I spent two very unprofitable evenings with someone I had believed would be very blessed to see me. Unfortunately, he could not see past my weight and thus passed judgment on me based on my outward appearance instead of my heart. I limped away from that visit shaken and questioning myself and what I was doing.
I stopped at a huge outlet mall to get some things for our business. I got lost and ended up walking far too much and soon I had to sit on a bench clutching my chest and terribly out of breath. I tried to call home to have my wife pray for me but the line was busy. Suddenly I realized this could be it and my life would end all alone in a city where I knew no one and no one cared if I lived or died.
After a few minutes of calming my fears and allowing my body to regain its strength, I slowly made my way to my van. Out of pure stubbornness I continued on my journey even though my body was not doing well and my mind had been slapped with a few fiery darts of doubt.
Two days later I was with someone I had driven 500 miles out of the way to visit. Very little good came of the visit for again, the person was hung up on my size instead of my heart. After wasting a day getting my van repaired, I headed home with little to show for my trip except doubts and bills.
A month later I found out I had a dangerous heart rhythm condition and was emphatically told to make no more trips. I did not object for I had learned again that despite having good intentions, those intentions must be in alignment with the will of God to be profitable.
I thank God that He pulled me through those difficult times both physically and spiritually. I thank Him for His patience in allowing me to again learn that it is not wrong to stretch your faith and try to walk on water, but you better make sure it is the will of God or you might get very wet.
I remember that time back in early 2009 for I was here at CB. I remember the prayers that went up on your behalf and know that it is only by the grace of God that you are alive today, my friend.
I remember those trips you made and your desire to bless others. You are right however, the desire may be there but sometimes... what we we believe God wants us to do and what He really wants us to do is not the same thing.
[quote]I thank Him for His patience in allowing me to again learn that it is not wrong to stretch your faith and try to walk on water, but you better make sure it is the will of God or you might get very wet. [/quote]
This is true and worth remembering!
I almost always enjoy your blogs, b2y! Yes, people judge so much on physical appearences. That's why Jesus was to be a "common" looking person. God wanted people to accept His message on it's merrit alone, not because a "good looking" messenger was bringing it! A good message, brother! And...glad you are okay!
Keep on preaching! God bless...
blessingstoyou, Thank you for sharing this story! It's is very sad and very real on many levels. But, I loved the way you summed up what you had learned. I can so relate. Your ending made me laugh at myself for an incident that happened to me. It was totally different from yours, but I still got "all wet!" This is such a good reminder to us all about so many things. Thank you. Thank you so much.
May the Lord give you a healing touch concerning your heart and arteries and may you continue for a long time writing such real and uplifting blogs. And, too, may He put it in the hearts of those you meet not to judge you for your weight, but for who you are in the Lord. Amen.
Your blog here is truly "words fitly spoken...like apples of gold in pictures of silver" (Pro 25:11)
God bless your heart.