You are not alone. Never, ever alone. Believe me, I know that it feels like God is gone, like he doesn't care anymore sometimes. And it feels like you are the only one in the entire world who feels this way. Rationally, you know that isn't true, that God loves you and that you are one of many people feeling this pain. All I can promise is that it gets better. God has something up his sleeve and he is preparing you for something wonderful. He is wonderful and marvelous and loves you so very, very much. This pain has nothing on what He is preparing you for. Stay strong, dear sister, please. Just wait and see.
"For eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him."-1 Cor. 2:9
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted," -Matt. 5:4
God has a great plan for you dear sister, just hold on.