One of the side effects I experienced while going through chemotherapy in 2008 was the inability to cry "normal" tears. Due to the powerful drugs I was taking and the fact that there was war going on within me at the cellular level, I had all sorts of chemical imbalances going on. It is hard to explain but when I would cry, I did not cry your normal salty tears. Instead, it felt like thick, drops of oil were gradually filling my eyes and slowly dripping down my face.
Strangely enough, this was extremely frustrating for me. Any woman who has longed for a "good cry" and has not been able to do so will know what I am talking about. Okay, perhaps you guys know what I am talking about too but I would know nothing about that .
I remember the day I discovered that I had normal tears. I got so excited that I cried even harder! I was like a parched garden being watered and watered and watered. Like I said, that might sound silly to some but if you have ever experienced the inability to shed tears (or normal ones) and then were able to, I think you might know what I mean.
We often view tears as a negative thing and indeed, sometimes they are. There is such a thing as "artificial tears". I had to use them during chemo and... while they moistened my eyes, they did nothing else. The genuine tears however, with the correct chemical balance, while they were painful in the onset, actually were the gateway to relief and the renewal of strength. They are a cleansing force, ridding the body of toxins.
Sometimes, we are very reluctant for God to see our tears. We view them as weakness and we want to be strong. We must always remember that God is not fooled for a moment. He is compassionate towards us. Indeed, He designed our very tears and they are a language that God understands.
Sister K, whilst many think that tears are so minute and so unimportant, yet God values them . He sees all our tears in our sorrows and even in joy and He stores them up in bottles as written in Psalm 56: 8.
Psalms 56, verse 8
[bible] 8: Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book?[/bible]
Thanks be to our Great God who even takes interest in our tears. [img]
From Hwa [img]http://www.thesmilies.com/smilies/office/fountainpen.gif[/img] Silverpen
I think it is quite a while...oh yes...I just remembered. I last cried the day before my daughter's graduation ceremony! I remember being so blessed by God that he had spared my life so that I might see my eldest daughter's first child and then my 'baby girl' graduating. Having faced the very real possibility of her mother dying and also battling her own medical conditions she was dressed up in her cap and gown ready for a photograph and there was me, blubbering like the blessed woman that I was (and still am).