This evening my husband is going to be working all night long at an event called Relay For Life which is sponsored by the American Cancer Society. He has provided technical support for this event for years but it has taken on a new meaning for him since I have had cancer. The event is over at 7:00 a.m. tomorrow morning. It will be a long night for him.
Over the years, he has had to occasionally work overnight events. Since January 2010, however, I find myself catching my breath just a little bit when I am home alone overnight. You see... my brain aneurysm ruptured just shortly after I fell asleep. My husband had thought he'd be done working until about midnight but things finished up early and he got home shortly after 10.
My husband tells me, that minutes after I fell asleep, and as he was just drifting off to sleep, he was suddenly fully awakened as I became violently ill and he immediately realized something more was horribly wrong... I was not only ill, I was choking and unresponsive. He had no idea what was happening but he knew that if he didn't act quick, I would die right there in my bed.
Crying out for our son who had just arrived home a short time before, they worked together to keep my throat clear and keep me breathing until the paramedics arrived minutes later. It's as simple as that. While I have no memory of this (only brief ones of the paramedics), I was eventually made aware of the fact that people generally do not survive ruptured brain aneurysm and those who do usually are awake when it happens. Most people who have these in their sleep, die. I have been told that if I would have been alone that night, I would have died within minutes due to strangulation. It's as simple as that.
Is it small wonder then, that there is an uneasiness which threatens to settle down upon me when I am alone at night? This is when I must remember, it is impossible for me to ever be alone for God is always with me. He is always with me... and He is also always with you. Of that I am sure!
In times of trouble, in fearsome times and times of distress... we are never alone... for we walk beside a big God who will never leave or forsake us. This is why we can say:
I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety. Psalm 4:8