The Waiting Game

I lay on the table and tried to sound confident and upbeat while my heart was racing. I told myself everything was okay, after all these are almost always benign. Although rather large, this fibroid had been there for at least 10 years. We'd known about it for a long, long time. It never stirred up any trouble. It was just... there. It's just that my primary doctor felt we should just take a peek at things to be on the safe side and so I was scheduled for an ultrasound on December 1st. December... why do health issues always seem to crop up for me in December. Sigh...

After performing the ultrasound, instead of letting me go, a doctor came in to talk to me. He wanted to do an additional ultrasound. "There's another fibroid." Yes, I knew that. I knew there were two. No, that was not what he was talking about. When compared to previous ultrasounds, one of them had disappeared which is exactly what they hoped they would do. One remained but the other one they were seeing; that was a new one.

As I laid there making casual, light-hearted remarks (like I always do), my mind was racing. These are almost always benign. I knew that but I also knew they were supposed to shrink or disappear with age, they'd said some of it was out of the cavity and if it was cancer... sigh. I whispered a prayer to God.

Did I suddenly hear a sigh of relief from the doctor? They were mistaken. The second ultrasound was showing that even though the fibroids were good-sized, they were contained. Also, the original one had not gotten any bigger. In fact, it had shrunk a bit. Not nearly as much as they would have liked but it had. Whew! That being said, they scheduled me for a consultation on December 13th.

Why did it have to be that day? I don't like December 13th. It had been confirmed I had cancer on December 13th and now, four years later, I might be looking at that again?

I headed to the doctor on December 13th reminding myself that this was simply a consultation to discuss my options. Instead I found myself on a table awaiting a biopsy. He actually had an opening that afternoon if I could wait an hour. We could just take care of it right now. I smiled and said, "Okay!" but inside I was thinking about a December 13th four years ago and I prayed.

The procedure went smoothly. Now, I had to wait. The waiting game. I've had to play it often over the past few years and it does not get any easier.

I got a phone call a bit ago. It was from the doctor's office. They had the results of my biopsy. The nurse started to say something when my connection was abruptly lost. Had I heard her right or was I mistaken. She called me back and asked what I had heard. I told her what I thought I heard her start to say but...

Oh! I had heard right! It is BENIGN!!!!!!!! :dance:

My heart is filled with thanksgiving and praise to God. It is benign!

Blessings!

K :princess:

Tl Sia @doulos ·

Fantastic! I'm rejoicing... :dance: