My Early Morning Battle




When I woke up the other morning I knew I was in trouble with my prostate.  The more I thought about this hindrance on my toilet habits my worst-case scenarios become louder and louder.  At this junction anxiety was setting in and I was not looking forward to the day ahead.  I even had myself being carried in an ambulance straight to the hospital with the flashing lights and siren wailing louder and louder.

It was at this point, or somewhere close; with the wild imaginations taking over my mind, that I was pulled up and realized that I was in a battle.  In fact, it was an extremely serious struggle for the possession of my thoughts.  One might call this a life and death struggle.  Looking back to this time when the realization came to me to cling to God and resist the enemy, was I believe, an intervention by the Holy Spirit.

I sat up in bed and began to loudly declare my position and status as a child of God.  In no uncertain terms I reminded myself, and all who cared to listen, that I was redeemed, sanctified, set free, healed, restored, partaker of the divine nature, live in the heavenly places, covered by the blood of Jesus, victorious, an over-taker, a child of God hedged in by the chariots of fire and set in untouchable places.  These decrees were repeated many times along intersperses of praying in the spirit.

During a session of the above declarations the Holy Spirit placed Psalm 148 into my mind.  On looking up the passage I was reminded again of the importance pf praising God continually and dwelling on his goodness and blessings.  I read the Psalm out loud several times to fix the idea of praise and thanksgiving firmly into my mind.  In doing so my head lifted and my thoughts become focused on things that are above and far away from the earthly circumstances.

Finally, I was able to rise up and partake of the day.  But my condition instead of improving gradually become worse during the day.  Looking back now I realize that I now started to bargain with God.  One thing I was determined not to do, was not to go the doctors for I knew he would put me on meds that last time caused massive insomnia.  God was my healer and I was believing in a supernatural intervention.  I did not hesitate to forcibly remind God of this in many guises and multiple times.

When I woke at 4am the next morning after going to bed at 12:30pm I knew I was in even bigger trouble, for now I could not use the toilet.  This after attempting to go every 10 minutes.  Around this time the thought came to me that may be God wanted me to go the Doctors.  Strange as it may be but the wild imaginations from the other morning did not pull me apart for I was of a sound mind.  Calm and at peace.

I looked up to God and asked, ‘Do you want me to go to the Doctors?’  His answer was swift, ‘Yes.’  I reminded God of the disastrous side effects the last time I took the alpha blockers.  His answer was simple, ‘I will hold your hand.’

I went to the doctors having obtained an appointment an hour after being one of the first to call in the morning.  God is still holding my hand.

Lessons from this – 1 Timothy 1:7 - For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline   NIV.

God has not called us to live a live of hanging our heads with foreboding thoughts and disastrous ‘what ifs.’  We are children of the Most High God, who walk this earth with our heads held high, looking to heaven, our home; and to Jesus the author and finisher of our faith.

We cannot allow the enemy to win control over parts of our body, which is the temple of the Holy Spirit.  If we crumble under the onslaught we give Satan legal rights to be an owner-occupier of a part of Gods real estate.

Praise and worship, both praying in the mind and spirit are formable weapons of righteousness that we possess.  We must remember to use them.

We must know and continually state our position before God.  We need to see ourselves as God see us, redeemed sons and daughters through the blood of Jesus Christ.

John B. Abela @abelajohnb ·

As somebody with multiple long-term medical issues, a few of which could be easily solved if I had health care, and could afford too, I very much get what you have said about both trusting in God, as well as realizing that sometimes we just need to take advantage of what is available and stop the suffering. Truly do hope your decision of the latter part starts to help!

Beth M @blest ·

Excellent blog
You will remain in my prayers

Steve Hurt @steveh ·

I've gone through the mental war and live with pain everyday. Paul lived through it and with daily pain too. For some reason that doesn't seem to be taught. Rest in mind and spirit you reached the same point he did with the Holy Spirit's help.
I don't like doc's and their meds either but they are there for a reason as we are to pray with you and for you.
God's comfort, you in this with power from above and within.

Les Braswell @doneuntotheleast ·

Agree with Beth and you remain in prayer as much for the physical condition as well as the raging anxiety the enemy uses against us.

K Reynolds @kreynolds ·

I know I would not be alive today if God was not my healer. However, I also believe that God is the one who has given doctors the knowledge, wisdom and skill to care for those who are sick and injured. Those things do not come from the enemy, they come from God! When I learned I had cancer and God made it clear to me that I was going to have to go through this experience, I felt impressed to begin to pray in regards to my oncologist. My oncologist is the chief medical officer of one of the largest health care providers in Minnesota. He only takes stage 4 cancer patients (I was stage 2) and only sees patients one day a week due to other responsibilities. In a way I could not possibly have engineered on my own my name was given to him and during an hour and a half phone conversation, he said he would be honored if I would accept him as my oncologist. Huh? It has been a perfect fit over the past 10 years and once again I am reminded that God directs our steps and puts people into our lives to help us as well.

John Knox @watchmanjohn ·

Yes God organizes our steps when we are aligned with his will