Coming out of the Shell

Let me bore everyone for a moment and talk about my cats. I have had one cat, Charlotte, for almost 8 years. She is a tortoise shell calico. She is small and dainty, and she is very affectionate to everyone. She has always been timid going outside. On the few occasions that I have brought her outdoors, she would walk closely to the house, hugging the exterior wall, and only getting brave enough to bound over to me. She has always been curious, sniffing at the door when it is open, even going out to sit on the porch at times. My other kitty, Molly, is gray with black tiger stripes. I have only had her for about a year and a half. Everything about her is large. My husband affectionately calls her "Pudge." She does not understand or apply the concept of feline grace. Everything with her is a.bang!* and a *BOOM!* Very rambunctious, very playful. Curious also to go outside. Where we live now there is no way of ensuring their safety from the cars on the road. So, to encourage longevity in the lives our our kitties we have a strict policy of never letting them outside. As they are curious, we have to be careful to never leave the door hanging open without someone there to keep watch. This is mostly for Molly. Over time, I have noticed something a bit strange. Or at least strange to me. There have been a few times, rare though they be, that the door has been left briefly open unguarded. And I have observed their reactions. There is some sniffing, some peeking. But it is very timidly, even fearfully. If anyone approaches, or a sudden breezes rushes through the door, they skitter away terrified. Even when the opportunity for freedom, even "safe" protected freedom arises, they are far too afraid to explore it. They have been trained to live in this confined space so now it is their comfort zone. Their only comfort zone. Now for me. I have long railed against my "gilded cage" as I put it. I have a home, a husband who loves me, a son to pour myself into. Yet I have always felt trapped, held against my will in this lifestyle, and unable to make any decisions for myself as to how my day would go. The mere idea of being able to decide what direction my life could go in would make me snort in derisional laughter. For a long time, we only had one vehicle, and my husband would take it to work. Home was my life, dictated to me by my son and my husband's needs and schedule. Well, this school year I have been presented with a bit of freedom. I have my own car now, and Paulie started school. Wow, wheels to take me where I want to go and over five hours a day to go there. And I am still trapped, I still hide. All this time I have been railing against the constraints I have felt put upon me. Truly, they were challenges. But like my kitties, I have grown so accustomed to my "cage" that it has become my comfort zone. I am paralyzed with fear to step outside of it, to spread my wings. My home has become the only safe place I know. Or has it? How often do we blame our circumstances for our feelings? How often do we look everywhere but to God for our help? How infrequently do we look inside ourselves to find the culprit of our misery? Now that I have found the chains that choke were created by myself, will I step out? Will I come out of my shell and let my light shine in the new arenas that God is allowing me to enter? Will I spread my wings?

@tinaesanil
Tina Edwin @tinaesanil ·

Dear i enjoyed this blog very much..Let me tell you one thing..I too love cats a lot. :) while reading this blog im realisg the fact that at times i too face the same situations...Sometimes renewed strength – spiritual strength, God’s strength – is all we need to face the problem or difficulty or testing or trial that confronts us.

It is easy for us to live victoriously for the Lord when we soar on the wings of eagles. It can be exciting when we run and don't grow weary in the work of the Lord, buoyed by his power and presence.

Love Tina :flower:

Do not include honorifics.

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