The past month I have been fighting loneliness. The problem is, either my friends aren't Christians or I only talk to them via text or on here. I don't have many people that I totally trust and can tell my true feelings to. I tried with one friend and the next day she didn't even talk to me. My one friend is in college and doesn't have a lot of time to talk to me. I have a really good friend, but we only talk over text and sometimes I wish I could talk more with him. I have been feeling really lonely. Now I know that we have God and He is all I need, but I feel like Adam in the garden of Eden. He was alone, all the animals had their mates. God said it was not good for man to be alone, so He created Eve for him. I feel like I am alone and seeing all these other people who have their "mate" as you could put it and are happy. Yes, I know no relationship is perfect, but they are blessed to have someone close to them like that. I miss the fellowship of having someone really close to me to talk to, someone who understands me and listens and cares. I feel alone. I have prayed to God and i know this time of "aloneness" is for a good reason and I know I need to work on things with God right now, so I am not complaining. But this is one of those moments when I ask God why? And just have to trust. Now I have a question... In Genesis, God says it is not good for man to be alone, but then in the New Testament, Paul speaks how it is good not to marry because you can best serve the Lord. I have seen both be good... Lets say we have a couple who are both on fire for God and love Him more then they love each other. They do missions and are a blessing to many people, but what they do they couldn't do without the other. They are a blessing to each other and encourage one another to grow closer to God and put God as number one. That is one of the times where it is good for man not to be alone. They take their relationship and point it at God. Now, we have a single guy who is called somewhere dangerous. There is war and he is called to spread the gospel to these people. If he had a wife, he would want to keep her somewhere safe and out of harms wa, which means he probably wouldn't take her with him to this place and might not go himself.. So he is held back by his longing to protect his wife. Also, some people don't mind being a lone and can live the life of celebacy. It is not a problem for them. Paul says that if we lust after someone then we need to get married so we do not sin. Ok, these are just random thoughts that are coming to me and they probably aren't making too much sense. Basically, I just don't like being alone... I want to be someones helpmate, someones best friend, someones encourager, someones accountablity partner, someones Bible study partner. I know I have God and that is ok, but it is something that I truly desire, and all I can do is lay it at the foot of the cross.
I know how hard it is, and it is hard waiting on God's plan to unfold. It is also hard to find a true flesh and blood friend in this world gone mad.
I know I have told you, but remember, run the race for Jesus, serve the Lord and be involved and look and see whom is running the race with you, who loves Jesus like you do and there you will find a true friend. It takes time, hard work, often hurt feelings but I know that this loneliness will not hang on forever! Either God will bring the right person into your life or God will make it so you are no longer lonely, you can count on it!
I love you lots!
I love reading your blogs. You echo so many of the things that I felt and went through when I was younger ... and some things I still go through. I was 27 years old before I got married and my husband was 33. All of my friends around me were getting married and finding their mate and I kept thinking what is wrong with me? But I know now that I couldn't have been married when I was younger. I wasnt' ready despite the deep desire to have a mate.
And even now, after 16 years of marriage to a man I deeply love and would have trouble living without ... I still get lonely some times.
I think that's God's way of bringing me to focus on Him instead of on this world so much.
Trust me when I say that the only thing worse than being lonely when you're alone is being lonely when you're married. Being in a bad marriage is worse than not be married.
I share with you words that someone shared with me regarding my son, who is desperately lonely and wants a woman desperately. He is so tired of waiting, and he's only 22.
The gist of what was said was that this burning desire you have to marry, shows that God intends for you to marry. Tdesire God gave you, He will fill at the proper time. The only way to reconcile that some folks are better married and some are better to stay single is kinda/sorta like spiritual gifts. Some are given to marry and some are given the gift of staying single. And God knows.
Gracie-Love your comment. And so very true. It's ok Sam. Just listen to God. And if you can't hear Him, get away and listen harder.
Samantha you ask very good questions and they all make perfect since. Somehow I believe you will get those answers from the only source that can answer them, our Lord. I can testify that everything in your life is done for a reason. I marvel at your presistence and awesome ability to show everyone the purity of your love. What an awesome gift you will be for some young man. I know our Lord has someone special for you.
I will say that it is always better to wait on the Lord. Look to Abraham and Sara, and remember their wait, and then remember their reward. What a reward, He had for them. The longer the struggle the greater the reward. I know yours be as special as you are.
Keep loving us with your little nuggets of friut.
your brother in light,